This.

"I like drinking coffee alone and reading alone. I like riding the bus alone and walking home alone. It gives me time to think and set my mind free. I like eating alone and listening to music alone. But when I see a mother with her child, a girl with her lover, or a friend laughing with their best friend, I realize that even though I like being alone, I don’t fancy being lonely. The sky is beautiful, but the people are sad. I just need someone who won’t run away."

(via STELLACOOPER)

Fell

Telepon ditutup. Kiki dan aku kompak diam. Bisa aja kami teriak, nangis meledak-ledak. Tapi kami cuma diam.
Satu menit... dua menit... tiga menit... kemudian kami sadar, kami harus move on; menyeret kaki keluar Caritas. Nahan sakit hati yang sakitnya...ya sakit banget lah pokoknya. Pintu mobil ditutup, kemudian hening lama.
"Happy birthday Lisa... happy birthday Lisa... Happy birthday happy birthday happy birthday Lisa..."
Mesin dinyalakan, kami jalan. Pulang.

"Aku pulaaang... tanpa dendaaaaam... ku terimaaaa... kekalaaahankuuuuu..."
"Tau nggak Dill, dari tadi lagu itu juga main di kepalaku."

Entah apa salah kami, tapi sepertinya alam semesta berkonspirasi.
Rasa-rasanya, semua yang terjadi hari ini adalah akumulasi kesialan dalam satu tahun yang di rapel dalam satu hari.

Lis, seharusnya ini buat kamu

We made you brownies, because birthday cake is too mainstream :'))

Selamat ulang tahun, Lisa. Kami tetep cinta kamu walaupun surprisenya gagal total sampe bikin pengen gantung diri. Tenang, walaupun kami ngga ketemu kamu, doa-doa kami buat kamu tetep ketemu Tuhan kok, tinggal tunggu tanggal terkabulnya aja. Peluk cium! <3

A Heart Touching

Don't we all find it sweet being remembered?

When people remember you, y'know it's a sign that they still care about you. 

Being remembered means they make a room in their mind for us to pass by, or if we lucky enough, to stop by and stay for awhile. 

I always love to know that people (esp old friends whom I seldom meet) remember me, how they still remember some little things about me. I looooooove it whenever I get a text or a phonecall simply saying they randomly remember me when they find anything related with me... 14, deer, my fav color, my fav songs, my fav band... even things that I hate (the cause of my phobia -_-)... the way they remember me...it all touches my heart :")

Maybe you still remember my post saying I was on (uhh shud I use this word?) misery. Hmm it seemed like God wanted me to smile ehehehe... so two days ago, I got my best day. 

I met Lisa and she gave me a red box with 14 photo sheets in it. She said she should've given it to me on Monday (May 14th) but we couldn't meet up because I wasn't in Jogja that time hehehe. Selamat Ulang Bulan ke-222? I swear I didn't even know May 14th means a thing to me :")
Oya, every photo has a word written in the back:
kamu - berarti - tua - hati - hidup - ingatlah - rasa - hari - nanti - jika - istimewa - kita - slamanya - ini

Yea like what you might have guessed, those words are the puzzle of a song...

Kamu sangat berarti, istimewa di hati
Slamanya rasa ini
Jika tua nanti kita tlah hidup masing-masing
Ingatlah hari ini

She also gave me a sketch of a deer. Said she couldn't finished it, but I think it's just too good to be true; knowing she drew it for me :")

I couldn't say enough thank you to show her how blissful I was :")
We spent three hours and a half, talking like there's no tomorrow. Uuuuu how I miss spending time with you, Lisaaaa... I never ever be able to spill out all of my thoughts to anyone else like the way I talk to you & Kiki <3

A thank-you is never enough

We Might As Well Be Strangers

I've ever mentioned how I hate how things change in a blink of an eye. People come and go, maybe I do so. But it tortures me like hell to face the loss.

I thought it was ok cause the fact is, everybody's changing so that their lives remain balance. Then for a moment I started thinking and realized, I've lost them, people who used to meant a world to me. I dunno whether it's me whom letting go too easily, or it's them who aren't willing to stay... But see, it hurts me so damn much.

I don't know your thoughts these days
We're strangers in an empty space
I don't understand your heart
It's easier to be apart

I blamed myself for giving up on them. But now, I think I've done trying... I'm not gonna spend my life kneeling down asking people to stay. People are basically meant to come and go, that's it. The door stands open, letting people in and out. We're all have the right to be freely walking from door to door, taking steps wherever we want.

We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in another time
We might as well, we might as well, we might as well...

Maybe the newcomers can't replace those who have gone. But it's okay, nobody is replaceable anyway. Newcomers are making new rooms, it maybe worse yet possibly better than the leaving ones.

...be strangers

Apa Kabar?

Halo.
Pengen cerita banyak di post ini. Siap-siap ya....... *kalo nggak siap, skip aja. Atau close tab sekalian.*

Calendar

"Kamu inget nggak?"
"Hm?"
"Hari ini, setahun yang lalu, aku kasih bunga ke kamu."
"Loh apa iya? Hahaha kamu inget?"
"Hehe..aku inget."